My car smells like farts. I am alone in my car. I did not fart. And so begins the worst slasher film ever.
Read Jason’s Twitter feed at @sween
Originally posted on May 18, 2009
Archive for May, 2009
From Jason Sweeney
May 29, 2009
From Henry Birdseye
May 28, 2009
HENRY’S SPECIAL TRAIL MIX RECIPE: 1) Pour a bag of chocolate chips into a bowl 2) You have just finished making my trail mix.
Read Henry’s Twitter feed at @tehawesome
Originally posted on May 12, 2009
From Adam Isacson
May 22, 2009
20 percent of Americans now
self-identify as Republicans. Which, coincidentally, is the percentage of dentists who recommend sugared gum.
Read Adam’s Twitter feed at @adamisacson
Originally posted on May 8, 2009
From Adam Isacson
May 22, 2009
Thanks for holding the door open even though you’re like 50 yards ahead of me, ma’am. Hold on, I’ve got to tie my shoe. Look, a nickel!
Read Adam’s Twitter feed at @adamisacson
Originally posted on May 6, 2009
From Nicole Currier
May 15, 2009
Whoever said falling asleep with the TV on was okay obviously never watches cooking shows and dreams about talking cartoon cucumbers.
Read Nicole’s Twitter feed at @bliccy
Originally posted on May 11, 2009
From Chris Aucutt
May 12, 2009
Eventually I’ll give up my knowledge of the release dates for every Beatles single and album for the US and Britain. Until then, singlehood.
Read Chris’s Twitter feed at @swamibooba
Originally posted on April 28, 2009
From Paul Feig
May 8, 2009
That early workout I planned ended up consisting of me rolling over and turning off the alarm. My left arm is now .00000000001% stronger.
Read Paul’s Twitter feed at @paulfeig
Originally posted on April 21, 2009
